Oh hey, you guys!

So this isn't totally surprising, I don't think, but the Great American Bar Crawl will be taking a hiatus for the month of February for some personal reasons.

Fret not! March brings warmer weather and the holiest of holidays for a girl like myself: St. Patrick's Day. I'm looking to plan out a Logan Square Luck-O-The-Irish bar crawl that will scour the area for new joints. If you're interested, you should probably express said interest sometime.

Meanwhile, Happy Black History Month and keep drinkin'!

The Mutiny

Well this was two years in the making.

Another neighborhood bar merely blocks from my front door, that is The Mutiny. Across from Quenchers at 2428 N Western Ave, this bar has been brought up in conversation multiple times. I've passed it on the bus more times than I could even think to count. I used to stare at it when I'd have my cigarette outside of ol' Q across the street. But it took over two fucking years for me to bring myself into one of the diviest of dive bars.

The Mutiny proudly proclaims itself to be "a dive rock bar since 1990". Though I've never seen a show there, I'd stand by that.

This was another adventure during the blizzard, a random decision after 2039482085 beers. A couple of friends accompanied some new friends we made across the street to finish the night. I had heard stories about this place - you could maybe say it's sort of legendary. It does have, as I learned (and later peed in) that night, the oldest and largest urinal in Chicago.

We walked into a bar that was barely lit. If it weren't for the street lights coming through the window, the glow of the jukebox and the light above the pool table, I might not have been able to see anything.

The owner was sitting at the bar and seemed like a pretty friendly guy. He talked to everyone that came in, helped behind the bar and saw that the giganto-urinal was iced regularly. Our draft PBRs were stupid cheap, as were almost all the drinks in the bar, though I couldn't remember the price (c'mon - I had been drinking for four or five hours at that point. In a blizzard, which is practically drinking in double time). The jukebox was packed with old classics like CCR and Guns N' Roses. This provided much entertainment.

There's a second room in the back, not completely partitioned off, where they were letting people smoke due to the less than favorable conditions outside. Nobody seemed to mind, myself included. Then again, nobody seemed sober enough to really form opinions at that point.

At closing time, the bar allowed us a chance to suck down one more shot, which I always appreciate. Then we ambled out back into the snow and I crossed another one of my list.

The crowd here was...interesting. Some young, Quaker hippies, some metal-looking cokeheads, the token old dudes at the bar and us. Everyone seemed content with what they were doing and there wasn't any tension, so hooray.

Will I venture back? Maybe someday, perhaps for a show, but I'll probably just detour to Quenchers and end up staying there.

Drinks: Cheap
People: Variety pack! All ages included
Atmosphere: Mega-divey
Grade: B-

www.themutinychicago.com

Quenchers Saloon

Ah, yes. The tried and true Quenchers Saloon. This corner bar, at the intersection of Western and Fullerton avenues (2401 N Western, to be exact), is a treasure chest for people who love beer. Music, too, but mostly beer.

With over 300 varieties available through taps, bottles and cans, there is no way you can walk into the bar and not find something you like. Really, it's impossible. I challenge any asshole to try. Now sure, is this another bar that I'm incredibly partial to? How could I not be? It's three blocks away, there's never a cover (just suggested donations) and all the free popcorn I can eat. With hot sauce.

My last visit to Quenchers took place during the Great Chicago Blizzard of '11. Some friends and I grabbed our PBRs, wandered out into the raging storm and made our way down Fullerton. Amidst the flashing lights of emergency crews and thunder snow stood a shining beacon of awesome.

The crowd was small...very small, for obvious reasons. We sort of took over and immediately loaded up on stouts, cream ales, IPAs, etc. There were delicious, warm pretzels with three different dips: cheese, beer mustard and regular mustard. While I'm unsure if the whole thing was open that night, Quenchers does have a kitchen and pretty tasty menu, especially if you like tater tots. And pizza. And tater tots on pizza.

When there's not live music (there is live music every night, usually after 10 p.m.), they have one of those ol' interwebby-jukeboxes. We definitely commandeered that guy to ourselves. We also applauded every other snow-goer who came through the door for the rest of the night. John, the bartender, didn't mind our kooky antics. I think he was happy to be making some money and having some fun during the winter experience of the season.

In terms of space, Quenchers is a nice size; however, it can get packed pretty tight on the weekends. There are two rooms, one with the bar and one with the stage for music. The bar is long and at a ninety-degree angle, so there's usually room to squeeze in somewhere and get your drink of choice.

Prices run from dirt cheap ($2 Blatz cans, anyone?) to a little higher, especially for some of the limited-edition tap brews.

As far as people go, Quenchers is pretty unpredictable. One night it can be home to a smattering of Bucktown hipster d-bags and then the next night, especially a Friday night, it can be packed with a strange assortment of Chads and Trixies. I've seen bachelor(ette) parties, birthday bonanzas and everything else take place. Basically, if you like beer, you'll fit right in. As long as you don't bitch and moan about it being cash only. If any of these things sound of interest to you, get your ass out of your living room and into Quenchers Saloon, ASAP.

Drinks: Cheap to Pricey, depending
People: Beer Drinkers, Hipsters, Yuppies, Chads, Trixies, all age ranges
Atmosphere: Casually hip
Grade: A

www.quenchers.com

Next time: The Mutiny

The Bob Inn

I swear I didn't mean to take a hiatus. Fret not, though - while I haven't been sitting down and pounding out these posts, I've still been going out and pounding down those drinks. I've got three bars to write about for you, with more on the way. That being said, it's time to share the magic that is the Bob Inn with you.

The Bob Inn, located at 2609 W. Fullerton, is the first bar I started going to on a regular basis in Chicago. I had met some folks while I was still living in Missouri who lived in Logan Square and when I moved to the city, we all met up. I was introduced to people who would soon become my roommates, best friends and just general motley crue. It was apparently one of their rituals to make an appearance at the Bob Inn every Thursday, when "The Coffin Banger" would do his weekly show. It is a tradition that still lives on two years later.

So let's talk about the Bob. It is a total dive bar, that's for sure, but I feel like in the world of dive bars, there are different levels. This is not a hipster dive bar (unless you go on a Friday or Saturday night), it is not a music dive bar, it is not anything other than a good ol', workin' man's dive bar. Definitely one of the only White Sox bars I've seen on the northside, there's sports memorabilia all over the walls and front window. There are two TVs that generally have a sporting event on, though if you go in the afternoon for a beer you can totally catch an episode of Jeopardy with the owner, Jimmy. The bar itself may seem like one of those places where your options include beer, whiskey or water, but it's actually fully stocked with several brands of all the major liquors and even some more random stuff (think malort's and ouzo). It's pretty dark, though there are an assortment of old beer signs, christmas lights and colored bulbs that provide enough glow to see the people you're with. There's also a pool table in the middle of the bar, which provides for several showdowns between me and a certain Philippe.

The prices, as with all dive bars, are totally cheap and reasonable. You get your 16 oz. PBR tallboy for $3.25 or you can take the classy route and have a well cocktail (think whiskey and coke or vodka and tonic) for $4.25. And don't you fret - they pour em' stiff. They also have specials on Labatt's, Becks and Hamm's daily.

The staff is amazing. It's pretty much the same two or three bartenders nightly, though again - if you go in the afternoon, you'll probably see Jimmy just hanging around. There's also Annie and Betty, the two sweetest women I've seen behind a bar since my days in Hannibal. They're easy to talk to, easy to listen to and when the bar isn't three-deep with hipster fools, the service is always quick and awesome.

Thursday nights are especially great with the aforementioned "Coffin Banger Show". DJ Pete shows up, spinning some of the best oldies (with a few new surprises in there) from 10 p.m. til' the bar closes. He often has theme nights or honors those rock n' roll greats who have passed with a special playlist. He works off requests, throws out trivia questions and is the most awesome, non-cheeseball DJ there is. People dance. People sing. People take off their shirts and run outside of the bar yelling (okay, that only happened once but who's to say it won't catch on as the new thing?). It's just one more special touch the Bob Inn offers.

Yes, I'm partial. Yes, it's very hard for me to find something negative to say about this bar. Sometimes the bathroom is out of paper towels. Sometimes you'll get hit on by a creepy man in his late 40s. But it's a dive bar! What are people expecting?!

Check this place out if you live in Logan Square, it's a treasure that shouldn't be missed.

Drinks: Cheap
People: Working class, Locals, All age ranges
Atmosphere: Relaxed
Grade: A+

www.myspace.com/24939439 (See? They still have a fucking Myspace, FANTASTIC.)

Next time: Quenchers